It has been a quiet month. Nearly three years after the world first shut down, I finally caught COVID. I'm writing this as a reflection for future-me just in case I ever think about getting it again.
The short version is that I don't recommend it.
The week before was a long, tiring and frequently cold week that ended with some very lovely but early morning / late night festivities. So come Friday, when I was feeling rough and exhausted, I figured that I needed some sleep and relaxation. I even cancelled my Saturday morning exercise so I could sleep in. Good choice since I woke up that Saturday morning with my skin and joints screaming, my head swimming and a bad reaction to the cooler air outside my duvet. That was a bad day, where walking the 10 paces to the kitchen was hard work.
Fortunately, the fever broke overnight and the next day I woke to find I could move more easily, although even with a heavy dose of paracetamol I was barely functional. My COVID tests had all dried up, so I dragged myself out to the local pharmacy for another batch and some flu medication - a 15 minute round trip which utterly wiped me out for the rest of the day. Got that test in and yes - positive. Sigh.
Thus began a week of sleeping and basically going nowhere other than a short walk around the block every few days. Coughing to the point of struggling to breathe, throat pain, photosensitivity and brain fog were the main symptoms along with utter exhaustion - it has been a long time since I've had so little energy. Each day consisted of a few hours awake, mostly spent watching things on Netflix and playing some videogames. Food was less than ideal - eating whatever would stay down did involve a significant increase in pizza and chocolate...
There were some positives. I watched all of Sonic Prime (enjoyable), Dragon Prince series 4 (good after a terrible start), and Wednesday (great atmosphere). I completed all my Christmas shopping (online). And as I got better I also wrote the first pass of an engineering strategy - although I haven't read it back so there is a good chance it is a terrible product of a malfunctioning brain.
It took about a week of being basically incapacitated before anything started to shift. There was a step change in the exhaustion, which stepped from "basically unable to move" up to "short distances are achievable with enough planning" and the coughing improved, although continued. However, the positive tests continued so I remained isolated.
Also, it's worth remembering that getting hold of a doctor to be signed off work is not easy. I called my surgery on the first day I was ill and the first appointment was thirteen days away - notably quite some time after the five days self-certification.
A couple of days into my second week, around 9 days after my first positive test, I had my first negative test. This was a huge relief as it meant I could go and sit in a coffee shop and actually see other humans from a distance. The short walk did, of course, completely exhaust me requiring an extended lie down and a snooze when I got home but it did help me stop going slowly mad. Symptoms continued to improve slowly, but didn't go away. The worst was the brain fog. Living alone and doing very little meant I didn't notice it so much, but any time I spoke to someone I realised that talking in complete sentences was a challenge. I'd frequently start talking and forget what I was going on about.
By the end of the second week I had returned (gently) to remote working. A few hours a day Thursday and Friday were enough to completely exhaust me again, leading to a weekend mostly asleep. The following week of lighter hours was another step better, but still struggling with some photosensitivity, ongoing exhaustion and brain fog. By this point I'm also having complications with fading fitness - three weeks off exercise and eating rubbish is not good in general. More significantly, any kind of illness like this triggers depression in me and the time of year (dark, cold and mostly wet) don't do much to counter it - so in addition to not wanting to get up because ill, I'm also not wanting to get up because depression. Of course I'm also still taking a heavy dose of paracetamol.
I'm really glad that the first week back was the run into Christmas and so quieter than it could have been otherwise. It also means that as I write this I'm holiday so I've been back off work for a few days recovering again. I'm certainly feeling better - my brain is clearing and the rest is very helpful. However, I'm still low on energy and coughing extensively. I'm hoping that next week (in the new year) I'll be well enough to start some proper exercise again and begin the slow rebuild of fitness. Either way I'll be back at work, trying to fight through all the email I missed while off.
Worse than this is the effect on my mental health. Anyone who has read this blog for a while knows I suffer from bouts of depression, and while right now I'm feeling ok I also require very little self-motivation and I'm "ok". I'm worried about myself for when I go back to work and have to push myself again, so I'm going to have to keep a close eye on myself and ensure I'm embracing sources of energy and joy as well as pushing through the energy-sinks and also the ripple effects into other parts of my life, such as maintaining exercise and cooking properly.
I appreciate this hasn't been a very interesting post, but I did want to document how I felt through this. I certainly didn't have the worst COVID, but I did seem to have a nasty dose of the simpler version and I'm not keen to go through this again. So, future-me - stay well.
