HTTPS for a small site - redux

A few years ago I set up LetsEncrypt for my sites, so I could create certificates, do HTTPS and blah blah security. Anyway, it all worked well until, nearly three years later...

Balls

Still, an automated process that has been running unattended for three years suddenly stopping working has never caused a problem, right?

It turns out some things have changed with LetsEncrypt in the last three years. Like, everything. Everything. Even the name. Now the thing I want is called Certbot. Fortunately (and against the trend in modern days) it has improved with time. Now there are packages and guides! Sadly, migration is going to be worse than setting things up in the first place. It's installing new software then making sure it's renewing certs generated in the old way, in the old place.

Sigh, here we go.

So I followed the install section of this guide then ran:

sudo certbot renew

And it ... just worked?! I don't understand. This is not computing.

Ok, I need to fix the cron too. That'll cause problems.

Starting as:

export PATH=<boring path stuff> && /another/path/letsencrypt/letsencrypt-auto renew >> /path/to/logs/renew.log

Change to:

/usr/bin/certbot renew >> /path/to/logs/renew.log

And ... that appears to just work too?!

Amazing. It looks like some things do get better.

Giving nice feedback

For a work environment to be successful, there needs to be trust among the people working there. Scrum echoes this in the main rule of the retrospective - everyone did the best that they could with the resources they had available at the time. Blame culture is being stamped out by progressive companies. People want to be able to approach senior management without fear (and senior managers want to be seen as humans). Everyone should feel comfortable in their workplace at all times.

All of this is a really good thing, of course. But it seems to me we are also in danger losing something important when it comes to personal feedback. Individual development often involves confronting uncomfortable truths about ourselves before deciding what to do about them, and a part of doing that is knowing what to look at. I've had too many conversations recently with people complaining that they don't get critical feedback. They know they are doing a good job - they are getting plenty of positive feedback - but they know they aren't perfect and want to know what to look at to develop.

So are we being too nice? If we don't give critical feedback when asked, is it because we don't see a problem? We don't want to upset people? Or is it we want to spare ourselves an awkward conversation? Speaking for myself, I very deliberately lean into being supportive over critical (yay me) but if I'm honest I can also see some of the last in my behaviour. Since people have been asking for more feedback, I've tried to change my own behaviour and be more open and offer more (constructive) criticism.

Initial findings are good. Firstly, I've had very positive feedback from people who've been pleased to have something pointed out. I've seen pennies drop and cogs start turning in people's brains. It feels like I'm helping people think, which is the object of feedback regardless of the context. Secondly, it has helped my own development. The first time I gave some properly honest feedback I could feel my own fear and anxiety welling up. But the person wasn't upset or horrified and they still talk to me. Over time, having awkward conversations has gotten a lot easier - and this is a really important skill to develop when moving into management. I'm really grateful to this person for making me think a bit differently about all this and one day I might find the courage to tell her.

Clearly, honest feedback is something to be given sensitively. Although the above might read like it, I haven't been walking round giving the benefits of my "wisdom" to anyone unlucky enough to be within shouting distance. I'm still very careful about who I talk to and when, and it's only people who are asking for it and I trust to have a sensible conversation.

How feedback is delivered is also important. For me, the classic "shit sandwich" technique misses the point somewhat here. We are not talking about problems, we are talking about development opportunities. We are not looking backwards at everything that was "bad", we're acknowledging the past and looking forward at how things could be in the future.

It's also important to ground the conversation in a concrete reality. That means talking about the impact - some of which might not have been noticed at all. For instance, "you are very smart, but are naturally quite blunt" is feedback but invites a "so what?" response. "You are very smart, but are naturally quite blunt and this means people who work with you can find you intimidating" is rather more significant. It speaks to a real (unintended) problem and also leads to a useful discussion about communicating ideas, bringing people along, working with people from other disciplines, and so on. This is all good stuff and it also gives the person enough to kick-start some positive self-analysis.

Of course all this must come with the caveat that it's aimed at helping good people be better. It's important to work with each individual in a way that suits them.

What's the conclusion here? Giving feedback is important, and I think it's very easy to make it meaningless by avoiding the difficult conversation. This does a disservice to those around us. Being too nice doesn't help anyone grow.

Tagging documents in Google Drive

I use the Google suite for various types of writing, including D&D. Google Drive will let me organise files by folder, which is very early 1990s. What I'd like is some kind of tagging system, so I can find the docs I have scattered all over the place. While it seems like something Google should probably support, while we are waiting for a miracle I can roll my own system using Google Scripts which is apparently mostly ES3, with some enhancement from ES5. So that's ... late 1990s. I guess that's an improvement?

Anyway, language hell is ahead of me and I'm sure at some point I'll convert it to use a proper API in a proper language. Right now, I need a simple way to do tags. Since I don't use the description metadata field (or indeed really acknowledge its existence until I started this) I think I'll use that. Adding something like #npc #story to the field is the level of work I'm willing to do - what I want is something that will pull these tags and list my files using them.

First things first - how on earth do I start writing Google Scripts? Obviously as a lovingly maintained part of the Google suite it'll be tightly integrated so all I have to do is ... add what it claims is a plugin to Drive and I can start creating script files which open in an in-browser editor (I hate in-browser editors, but here we are). Then I need an index file and something to call it. It seems that when loading, the doGet method in the Code.gs file is called and that needs to hit the HTML file. This all needs accessing via a URL to the dev or published version. Ok:

Carefully not thinking about what will happen if a user isn't using Javascript, let us push forwards. Templating seems pretty simple so an HTML file can be put together. I can also drag in a CSS file from somewhere else so I can reuse my awesome styling.

All I'm looking to do here is create some lists, so I just need to get the filenames and links and put them on the screen. Specifically, I'm getting a list of tags then creating a list of files per tag.

Google Scripts provides a load of objects to poke and since it's taking care of the authentication (the main reason I'm doing it this way rather than using the api) this should be pretty straightforward. I mean the only way this could go wrong is if the scripting is using Javascript from before the dawn of time and I have to do absolutely everything myself?

Argh.
To be fair it's not too bad once I've got my head out of Ruby and back into Javascript and then removed all the ES6 goodness I've come to expect in the years since it became commonplace. I can actually craft exactly what I'm looking for:

Under the hood ... eugh. It's pretty ugly - and not just because I've used two different forms of a forEach loop in a single short script. To generate this page, I'm looking at each file to get a list of unique tags then reversing the process - looking at each file to figure out if it has the tag I'm interested in. This is not Efficient Code^TM. On the other hand, it is Working Code^TM so it'll do as a proof of concept. I'll make it less awful when it gets too slow or I translate it all over to the API.

In the meantime, I have a document tagging system, and I can still use my favourite online text editor, even if I had to write the code in my less than favourite online code editor. And here is the code all in one place. One day I'll get tagging and Markdown support from Google itself...

The year that was, 2018

2018 is more or less over and it's time to look back and decide if it was worth the bother. Work has been tough this year, with a new role and responsibilities but despite that I've managed to improve my physical and mental health (especially the former). But it's not good enough, and I think 2019 needs to be a year where I focus on sorting out my personal life. I'm still not creating enough, and that is in part because of the limited time I spend doing useful things outside of work. Still, this is post is about the things I have done so let's look at the positives. It's not all Elite Dangerous and YouTube.

• 13 posts on this blog (14 including this one)
• 2 posts on my gaming blog
• another year of the Year in Pictures site, up to 21 photographers
• created the Year in Pictures helper and only completely broke it once
• over 239 contributions to various projects on github (down from last year)
• started a new D&D game (Elsewhere) resulting in much writing, drawing of maps and running of sessions
• went on another photography course to learn how the rest of the buttons on my camera work
• 100+ pictures on my instagram account
• loads of photos on my flickr stream
• became a Reader at the British Library (and failed to find the thing I was looking for)
• helped out at Codebar
• lost a load of weight
• started back at the gym properly
• updated my website and Gareth's website
• made a set of coasters with pictures of my nephew at different points over his first year

It's not a lot, but this has been a very work-centric year. That is definitely something to change in 2019. On top of this, I've also learned to pick a lock, introduced some friends to the joys of the escape room, done a load more sound desk stuff, and failed to see the friends I mentioned last year.

Resolution count: 6/10 - definitely improving over previous years.

This coming year needs to do more with what I started this year. More serious exercise, with an endgame I'm actually happy with. Code more. Draw more. Create some things that aren't the blog / game cycle. It's going to be another busy one at work, which means I need to be careful to avoid just getting sucked into it. After a scientific analysis of work and play I'm going to be doing at least one thing every month. And I will definitely see those people this year.

Brace yourself, everyone. 2019 incoming...

Mental health and maths

There are a million connections between social media and mental health and most I know about show a strong (albeit anecdotal) negative connection between the two. People are constantly saying they've taken a break from Twitter and feel much better for it, and I know that for me avoiding "debating" (or more accurately "screaming impotently into the void") on social media is definitely a good thing.

But what happens if we look at this backwards? Engaging with the world, as opposed to withdrawing and shutting down is supposed to be positive, right? In theory, social media is about reaching out and connecting (haha I know, but stay with me). I know that when I'm feeling happy and on top of the world I look at it with interest and very often take photographs of the things I see. Some of those photographs end up on Instagram. When I'm exhausted and my mental health is poor I shut down to preserve energy and I feel like I'm doing a lot less, such as taking fewer photographs.

So in theory I should be able to see a correlation between taking lots of photos and posting them to Instagram and times of good mental health. Good - I've needed an excuse to write some code. Cue the music.

A bit of hacking later and I've got a bit of Ruby which looks at my Dropbox Camera Uploads directory and counts the photos I've taken this year, grouping by month. And I've got another bit of code which looks at my Instagram feed and does the same, but using a deprecated API because I'm not a business and apparently that means I'm out of luck in their new world.

And lo:

The very obvious peak in October is at a time when I had a week off, had just had some very good news and actually Did Things outside of work (walked the Two Tunnels walk in Bath and went to a display of Japanese art in Bristol). Coincidentally I also wrote a post about having a peaceful time off. So it was a good month - or at least a good week in a month.

At the other end of fun, the two obvious troughs are in July and November. This matches my memory of the year - times when I had to drag myself out of a major slump. This was especially true in November, when I had far too much to do both in and out of work. In work a long series of things went wrong and I was on the back foot the entire time - which resulted in me writing a post about reactive vs proactive work. Outside of work I basically stopped doing anything as I worked late and spent the evenings recovering. I felt my engagement with the world around me suffered and this is born out in the numbers.

Otherwise it's pretty stable through the year other than an upwards tick in August (another holiday), so what happens if we add a trend line?

An increase in photos taken over the course of the year, but interestingly a decrease in photos posted to Instagram. So I'm snapping more, but gradually getting less interested in the world around me? That's quite possible. I mean, have you seen the world?

Last year I had an interesting time and I started this year writing about recovering from an actual crash. So what happens if we overlay 2017 Instagram engagement with 2018 engagement?

*hack hack*

This happens:

I was at my lowest in November and early December 2017, which correlates nicely with ... the highest engagement of the year. Hmm - that messes with my theory. December I can easily explain - I was away from work for most of that month, actively recovering, and spent Christmas with my parents walking miles and taking photos of their village. November is a mystery. Looking back, it seems in November I went for a few long walks around London and posted multiple pictures from each which brought the count up. Confusing. Moving on to trends.

Rate of posting to Instagram increased over 2017, which is mostly expected with the exceptions above. The decline in 2018 still worries me, as does the change in style of my pictures over the last 24 months. I used to put more thought into use of abstract space and filters, giving more texture to the posts. More recent photos are pictures with limited work on them - pictures of things rather than more artistic expressions, if you'll forgive the phrasing. It's not all bad - the technical quality of my pictures has definitely improved - however it plays to the narrative of less engagement from me in the output.

So what have I learned? This kinda works. It's certainly not good enough to create an early-warning system to tell me to Take Steps if my frequency of posting drops below a certain level. But there are some interesting patterns and going through this has got me thinking about changes I can make in life which will hopefully make a positive impact. I have strong, positive memories of the various Things I've done, and those Things tend to generate photographs. So if, loosely, I can do more Things I should improve my general outlook on life. I hope? I spend a lot of time in London, so finding something interesting and photo-worthy to do once a month shouldn't be the hardest thing in the world. Now I need an arbitrary point in the year at which to make fresh-start promises to myself. Some kind of Resolution for a New Year, perhaps?

If you're interested in details, the code is all on Github and  I used Google Sheets for the spreadsheet to generate the graphs. I am not a doctor and I'm well aware this is not Science.

Reactive vs Proactive

What feels like years ago I asked a friend an important question: "How do I be less reactive and find the time to think and plan?"

Why is this important? Reactive work treats symptoms, not underlying causes. The problems and work is never really done, never really goes away so the job remains static. Well; static plus all the extra stuff people find for you to do all the time. If this happens for long enough, eventually someone more senior may notice you're overloaded and hire another person to take some of the load. Unfortunately this approach relies on another person noticing and taking action - and this is a person who has hired you to make their life easier, not to give them more work. It might happen, but I suggest your mileage may vary. Personally I'm not inclined to passively wait for someone else to save the day - I need to be doing something to make the world change, which brings us back to the opening question.

So - how? Local context changes, but I believe the basic theory is more or less consistent - eliminate the bits that don't need doing and delegate the rest. Keep only the work that you need (or want) as key parts of your role.

Elimination is pretty obvious. Do I really need to maintain that data? How about attending that working group? Do I have to be part of that initiative (also a delegation option)? If you, like me, have been in a place for a while you'll likely have also accumulated a load of legacy responsibilities which are linked to a previous role, but no longer relevant. Purge them all - ruthlessly. A rolling stone gathers no moss, etc etc.

A good trick I've discovered for this is to talk through my calendar with someone else. If I can't justify the time I'm spending on things, it needs to go. Inevitably, this will be the fun stuff. Depending on the depths of my own self-loathing at the time, I usually give myself a few hours a week to indulge in some enjoyable but slightly lower priority activities - the rest must be sacrificed in the pursuit of a clear diary. The rewards are the ability to spend time thinking.

Next up is delegation. In the Olden Days, delegation meant handing work to someone you trust. This has a whole world of its own problems. We'll come back to it as in the New Days there is a better choice available to us in tech - write an app, script or some other bit of magic to make the computer do all the work for us. Not only does the problem go away, but it makes us look like wizards.

More seriously, to properly solve a problem with code you need to thoroughly understand it. In my experience that means refining underlying processes which ends up solving a much wider range of problems than was originally intended. For example, in an effort to answer some basic questions and stop maintaining some data, I got involved in how the master copy of that data is maintained by another team. Working with them has helped drive change in that area and cross-team understanding of their processes and challenges.

Once the computer is doing all it can, you're left with delegating to people. At the risk of sounding like a stuck record, this is enabled through community and leadership. Build a good team of empowered people, give people clear goals and a clear space in which to do them, then trust them to deliver. This last is difficult. I need to write about trust at some point, but for the moment an important reminder - trust needs to go both ways. If you trust someone, they need to trust you - to give them space to learn, to know they have your support, to fail, whatever. If you want people around you to be reliable and give their best you need to behave in a worthy way.

I'm on a journey towards being properly proactive - a winding journey which seems to loop back on itself with annoying regularity. I'm never going to get there fully - I'll always have short-term things to deliver for other people, business cases to write, and other exciting bits of admin to do, but I am certainly getting better at forcing the dial further in the direction I want.

But at what cost?

If you've been reading this blog for a while, you'll know my primary motivation for doing more management style work is to make life better for other people. Better is, of course, a subjective thing but there is a strong emotional component to it and being valued as an individual is part of it. But work to help the individual is often more reactive and, in the long term, provides less value. That said, it doesn't stop me feeling awful about some prioritisation decisions I have to make. I may have put in place some very valuable governance which will make transparent the foundations for certain decisions, but if it's been done at the expense of a pay case for someone who is not being paid properly I've failed the individual. I can put off the proactive strategic work, of course, but then it never gets done - there is always another piece of essential reactive work.

Keeping the balance is really hard and sometimes involved making tough and unpleasant decisions. It's too tempting to slip back into only reacting to immediate needs and never think through or develop the future. It's also very possible to just abandon the needs of others in the pursuit of building a "better" organisation. I have no great insight here - I'm just writing about the place I find myself in at the moment and how I feel about it. I do know that I can't spend my whole life treating symptoms. I also know that if I just ignore many of those symptoms, I turn my back on the very reason I do this work. However there is only so much of me I can give to work before I run out of me - and I have a habit of stretching the me available to make it all fit in. I'm going to keep looking for a better solution.

A peaceful break

I find myself starting a week off work and for the first time in ages I'm not worried about all the things I haven't done, panicked by the future or generally feeling guilty about not being in the office. This feeling of peace makes for a nice change, so rather than ruin any benefits through analysis and naval-gazing, I'm going to embrace it and relax.

Hahaha of course not. So what's different this time?

I'm more in control of my time these days. I still have far too much to do, but I've been working to push further out of reactive work and into proactive work. Knowing I've got this time off, I've been focusing on setting things in motion which can run while I'm away. That means I haven't left much blocked, awaiting my input. This feels good.

I've reached the end of a few bits of ongoing work. Clearing out the backlog has really helped me feel like I've made concrete progress and some of that work has fixed things I've felt incredibly guilty being left undone. These fixes should run themselves now, which will reduce ongoing load. This also feels good.

So is it just that through luck (and some judgement) I've managed to time this holiday well? Possibly. I guess I'm also starting to feel effective at some of the things I've written about before. Bringing some things to a close, or at least a good breakpoint, feels like success which is a positive feedback look that has been missing from my professional life for a while. I'm also aware that despite this being a pretty lethal week, I've not sacrificed making time for people who have needed it so I've managed to deliver without compromising my core rule. This feels extra-good.

Overall, it's not just peace - I actually feel good about work for a change. It took some self-analysis to dig that out, but I guess it's been worth it.

It also doesn't hurt that I'm surrounded by some fantastic people who I can trust to put out fires while I'm away, either.